When someone mentions the term natural disasters one may conjure up images of hurricanes, tornadoes, volcanoes and earthquakes.
But, if we think about it, toddlers are natural disasters as well.
I’ve got TornadRo and a HurriKaya leaving nothing but devastation in their wake.
10 Reasons Why Toddlers are Natural Disasters
1. They destroy homes, belongings and all personal property.
I can’t even count the amount of my belongings these two have ruined. Writing on things besides paper, chewing anything that’s not food, and trying to break computers is a favorite of theirs.
2. After encountering a natural disaster you’re left with feelings of bewilderment.
I really have to take a little sit-down and recouperate after getting them down for a nap or to bed at night. I feel frazzled and lost for a good 15 minutes before I come to my senses and can move forward in life.
3. There aren’t many ways to protect yourself from them.
Like…seriously… what can you do? Whether it’s your own child that’s destroying your well being, or someone else’s… you can’t really fight them off. You can’t hide from them for very long either.
4. Moving won’t help you avoid one.
They’re everywhere. ::whispers:: Everywhere.
5. They cause your belongings, and debris to go flying everywhere.
I clean up every night. Every. Night. In the mornings I wake up to a decent house… then by naptime I can’t see the floor. The Tornadro is the worst with this. I swear he’ll be a rock star when he grows up because he trashes his room like it’s a hotel.
6. They leave you scarred for life – physically and emotionally.
Have you ever gotten an “accidental” headbutt or a fingernail scrape from a wild toddler? They will draw blood. And they won’t give a shit. They’ll fight you, beat you down and leave you broken, battered and bruised… then ask you for some juice.
7. They make you wonder “God, why me!?”
When the disaster hits, even atheists start to pray for it to end.
8. Eruptions are random and unpredictable.
You can consult the farmers almanac all you want…. these natural disasters will spring up at times you least expect it. First thing in the morning, 2:am at your bedside…. Anywhere.
9. They have no regard for human life.
Or any other life form. Or inanimate objects. They’re ruthless. Hide ya kids, hide ya wife.
10. They’re costly to recover from.
#nuffsaid
What other ways are toddlers Natural Disasters?
Ah…I don’t have children of my own, but I do have nieces and nephews! The things you point out here and I wonder every blue moon if I really want to get myself into that! In reality, I’m quite ready to move into that portion of my life, but I know it will take strength! I pray for it everyday because I know the time is coming!!
This is just perfect! As I was reading this, I have at toddler taking my hair and twisting is in the air, putting my sunglasses on and off my face,showing me where my nose is and making sure I type this correctly. < since he knows better than I do) 🙂
They are natural distaters because unlike a pet, you can not kennell them nor crate them or put a gate up so they can keep to themselves. You allso just have to tolertae them and mutter to yourself one day they will have kids of their own.